~edge~

Oops... another post a day late. Why do I keep losing track of time? lol

Well, on this Tuesday it is a blistering 88 degrees Fahrenheit, and I sit here in my air conditioned (slightly-cluttered) apartment listening to contemporary Christian music and dreaming of lunch.

I was recently standing on my balcony overlooking the sunny south-side of Dallas when I started to slip into my nothing box (all men have it, look it up if not sure what it is) :P

When in this box, personally, I forget all my worries and concern (or at least move them to my back burners). Those moments when my fore-brain are empty and alone are when I feel most at peace. Stress is nonexistent and all that does exist is the pleasantness of life; breathing, seeing, tasting, hearing, feeling -- the senses can work independently while the brain 'sighs'. A great time to go to this box is after you spend 6 hours on a homework assignment, this reward can also act as a safe place.

Mental health is not something that comes easily, especially with time. It seems the older I get, or anyone, people have more stress and sadness in their lives.

As mentioned in an previous post, people hang on to sad memories WAY better than the happy ones. We can be so determined to mull over failures and regrets as the past successes feel distant... GRR.

We stand on the edge, like I was this afternoon overlooking the 6-story differential between my body and the warm grass-splotched earth below. Maybe you feel like any push will make you crumble and lose... lose what?

Hope?

Progress?

Friends?

Family?

Sanity?

I've felt those feelings, or more the fear behind losing them.

That's why breaks are important!

The work week is typically 5 days for a reason, allowing 2 days of rest, relaxation and rest. After a full-break I don't have to fear failure because I know I have the resources (mainly sleep) at their full, and the day can throw what-it-may in my direction.

Those who are successful are often the ones who experienced the most pain and discomfort, so make use of your working days! Face the weekly challenges head-on and allow the weekend to be time for yourself and friends.

Personally, I've struggled keeping the balance between work and play. As I finish my fifth-year of college I feel as though I've done everything and nothing with my life... sometimes I wonder if I'm even glimpsing my purpose...

Maybe you too feel at a disconnect with your dreams; you could be 15 or 51 and you're not sure what you are supposed to do.

First, step back from the edge and look up. The ground looks plain, but the horizon is yours for the taking if you wish.

Second, do what you like doing! I enjoy waiting (restaurants), and though I've had setbacks I still love serving others food. It's a starting/early-phase type of work for me, but if it's what you like to do then live that out! If your dream career feels distant and you don't have the credentials, guess what, start TODAY. Google can be your friend, research the steps and begin now.

The edge is a place where people go when they lose hope, maybe in an effort to throw themselves over and call quits... or... it's a place where people come to the realization that there is more out there.

Snap back into your reality, into the life you want.

Have faith in God, that He will accompany your journey, and surround yourself with friends/accountability. With a strong will to win plus a supportive circle, you will be untouchable!

Alright, my stomach is having a one-sided conversation with me, competing with the music on my Sony speaker. Guess I should take him to lunch to shut him up.

See you Monday <3